Shang Jue pushed Lu Yuxing down from his chest.
Lu Yuxing wrapped his arms around his waist, keeping him in place. “I’ll be careful this time,” he said, lowering his head again to kiss him gently for a long time.
After what felt like an eternity, they parted. Shang Jue noticed Lu Yuxing's flushed face and damp lips up close, feeling a sudden awkwardness. He cleared his throat.
Kissing a dog with memories feels different.
Lu Yuxing warmly held him, a smile curling at the corners of his lips. Shang Jue couldn’t help but doubt whether the person in front of him was the same as half an hour ago.
He raised his hands, pinching Lu Yuxing’s cheeks and pulling at them. Remembering that he was still carrying a pot on his back, he started to unhappily hold him accountable. “You said I was fishing for you. What exactly did I do to fish you?”
Lu Yuxing hadn’t expected Shang Jue to bring this up at that moment. As Shang Jue tugged at his face, Lu Yuxing tilted his head but didn’t break free. “I asked you if your sexual orientation had changed. You said this thing is inherently unstable. I’ve been guessing for a long time which side you’re on, yet you’ve been silent. You haven’t really talked to me in two weeks.”
Shang Jue explained, “Isn’t it because it’s almost finals and I need to study? You’re in the dorm every day reading; I can’t just distract myself, right?”
“……” Lu Yuxing grabbed the hand that was pinching his face and pressed it down hard, adjusting his breathing.
“Last night you pretended to be drunk…”
Shang Jue frowned, knowing he was about to bring this up. “I was almost humiliated last night, doing this and that with you… Wasn’t I trying to win you back?”
Getting himself drunk, pretending to be tipsy, calling “baby” in front of the other two straight guys in Room 323, and shamelessly asking for hugs… Did he really think his mental defenses could be broken so easily? In the end, he was dismissed with Lu Yuxing’s simple “fishing” remark.
Lu Yuxing paused, incredulous. “You were trying to win me back all along?”
He had never seen it before.
Shang Jue replied, “I…” It indeed wasn’t very obvious that he was trying to win him back.
“Since you moved back to Room 323?”
“Yeah.”
Lu Yuxing lowered his gaze in thought.
Seeing him deep in serious contemplation, Shang Jue suddenly felt awkward and leaned in to plant a kiss on Lu Yuxing’s cheek.
Lu Yuxing snapped out of his thoughts and turned to continue kissing him. But Shang Jue, with an empty stomach, suddenly realized he was hungry. “My tangyuan must be cold.”
Lu Yuxing stepped back, releasing him.
Returning to his seat, Shang Jue tested the temperature of the two food containers. He and Lu Yuxing had been lingering for almost an hour; luckily, the heating in the dorm was decent, and the food hadn’t gone cold.
“Is it cold? I’ll heat it up,” Lu Yuxing said, reaching out to check the temperature as well.
“Forget it, it’s still okay.” Shang Jue opened the container and took a spoonful of the tangyuan. The sweet sesame filling slid down his throat, whetting his appetite.
After a few bites, Lu Yuxing leaned against the edge of his desk, watching his profile.
Shang Jue set down his spoon. “Are you just standing there watching me like a criminal?”
Seeing that Shang Jue wasn’t actively chasing him away, Lu Yuxing continued to stand by his desk in silence.
After finishing a bowl of porridge and some sweet tangyuan, Shang Jue felt nearly full.
Just as he was about to clear the dishes, Lu Yuxing swiftly helped him cover the food containers, tidied up a few things, cleared the desk, and asked, “Want some cake?”
As Shang Jue shook his head, Lu Yuxing leaned down and cupped his chin, kissing him again.
Shang Jue’s ears instantly turned hot, and between breaths, he cursed, “Damn… at least let me rinse my mouth first?”
He was sitting in a chair while Lu Yuxing, taller than him, leaned over, kissing for over ten minutes before realizing this position was quite uncomfortable.
Lu Yuxing’s arm wrapped around Shang Jue’s knee, while the other hand supported his back, lifting Shang Jue off the chair.
Shang Jue was caught off guard, never imagining that at his height of over 1.8 meters, he would ever be princess-carried by someone.
Before he could react, Lu Yuxing boldly occupied his chair, placing Shang Jue securely on his lap.
Shang Jue: “……”
The sensation beneath him changed to firm muscle, creating an indescribable strangeness. Shang Jue forced himself to sit for a few seconds before suddenly bouncing up.
Lu Yuxing felt empty in his arms and looked up at him. “What’s wrong?”
“...It feels a bit strange.”
Lu Yuxing was puzzled. “Really? What’s strange about it?”
Shang Jue thought for a moment and said, “I think it’s the position. Otherwise, why don’t you sit on my lap and try?”
Lu Yuxing considered it and thought... it did feel a bit strange.
He hesitated and said, “I weigh more than you do. It would be heavy for you if I sat on your lap.”
That seemed reasonable, but Shang Jue still felt something was off.
After hesitating for a while, he moved closer again. To appear more bold, he spread his legs and sat down. Glancing down at his sitting position, he still felt something was amiss.
From the moment Shang Jue sat on him, Lu Yuxing’s breathing suddenly became light and slow.
Light, but drawn out, as if he was holding back something and struggling to control his breath.
He remembered Shang Jue’s words and told himself: This is a chair, not a bed.
Shang Jue, having finally built up the mental fortitude to sit there, leaned down and kissed Lu Yuxing’s lips.
Lu Yuxing responded lazily, but as the kisses continued, his movements became slower, and eventually, he turned his gaze to the air beside him, avoiding looking at him.
Shang Jue: “...”
Shang Jue: “Hey.”
Lu Yuxing returned his gaze, too embarrassed to correct his address, looking at him calmly despite his flushed face. “Hmm?”
“What’s going on? Are you already bored with me after just two hours?”
“...No.”
Shang Jue thought it was unlikely and, feeling a bit tired himself, decided to take a break.
He lowered his eyes and saw Lu Yuxing's hair whorl. This angle felt a bit new to him; the last time he saw it was over two months ago when he recorded Lu Yuxing and ruffled his hair.
This time, Shang Jue couldn’t help but reach out to play with Lu Yuxing's hair, doing it with a wildness that made the other’s neat hair a mess.
Lu Yuxing ignored him and didn’t look up, his gaze fixed on Shang Jue’s collarbone.
He remembered that spot had a mole... positioned just right.
Lu Yuxing's breathing slowed even more, forcing himself to turn his head to the side and redirect his focus to Shang Jue's closet.
Shang Jue smiled and asked, “Why do you keep looking at my wardrobe? Do you have your eye on something? I could buy you something new.”
“...” Lu Yuxing turned his head back and asked quietly, “Were you really conservative before?”
Shang Jue replied, “Oh, that was a lie.”
Lu Yuxing: “...Okay.”
Hearing him bring this up, Shang Jue seemed to seize a chance to redeem himself: “You see, I really didn’t want to go that far. I only said that to avoid expanding our influence, right?”
Lu Yuxing didn’t respond. He held Shang Jue’s waist and gave it a gentle squeeze, saying, “You should get off. The heating is a bit too warm.”
Shang Jue was already sitting awkwardly and quickly got off.
Lu Yuxing stood up and went to the balcony, closing the sliding door to the dormitory, then opened the balcony window to let the cool breeze in, turning his back to Shang Jue.
Shang Jue remained alone in the dorm, and half a minute later realized something was off.
Revisiting old topics, did he get upset again?
Ten minutes passed. Lu Yuxing cooled down on the balcony, his embarrassed face returning to normal, his body also cooling off. When he turned back to the dorm, he found Shang Jue staring at him intently, his expression a bit serious.
Lu Yuxing assumed Shang Jue was unhappy about being left alone for too long and stepped forward to hug him, awkwardly explaining, “I really was getting a bit hot just now.”
Shang Jue felt Lu Yuxing's icy skin brush against his cheek, causing him to doubt his own judgment.
“Lu Yuxing,” he began, “are you still upset about me lying to you?”
Lu Yuxing was momentarily stunned, not understanding why he suddenly brought this up.
But he answered decisively, “No.”
His anger towards Shang Jue had only existed on the night he discovered the truth after recovering his memory; since then, he had mostly been at odds with himself.
Shang Jue’s expression softened a bit. He had apologized at noon and made a grand confession, completely breaking down his boundaries and sense of shame, and he was finally able to show some grievance: “I’m not trying to excuse myself...”
He felt it was necessary to explain the motivation behind his lie. “I rushed over after receiving the call about your accident. Isn’t that pretty decent of me?”
Lu Yuxing nodded, “Hmm.”
Given their relationship at the time, Shang Jue could have easily left the matter to Ge Zhicheng and others, not needing to come personally and care for him all night.
“During the amnesia, was I still okay with you?”
Lu Yuxing glanced at him.
Lu Yuxing recalled the midterm exam and felt grateful to Shang Jue for that. But...
They exchanged a glance, both thinking of the cost Lu Yuxing had paid in the end.
He had recorded Lu Yuxing and there was a video of their anniversary on Shang Jue’s phone. It might seem trivial now, but if they hadn't gotten together, that audio and video could have become Lu Yuxing’s lifelong embarrassment.
Remembering this, Shang Jue suddenly felt unable to continue speaking.
But Lu Yuxing closed his eyes, generously responding with another “Hmm.”
Shang Jue regained a bit of his composure and quickly took advantage of the moment, “I initially didn’t plan to lie to you, but when I saw how you saved my contact in your phone..”
That note was later changed by Shang Jue to avoid being exposed as a liar by Lu Yuxing.
"It's normal for me to be upset if you give me such an ugly nickname, isn't it?"
Lu Yuxing replied, "..."
"Who knew you didn't usually curse, but secretly talk about me like this?"
"..."
Shang Jue tried to find some hint of guilt on Lu Yuxing's face, but after staring for a while, he didn’t see any trace of such emotions.
He frowned and said, "At least show some reaction! An explanation would be nice."
Lu Yuxing's expression became somewhat complicated. "That's because I heard you cursing at me in the bathroom during high school—"
Shang Jue immediately refuted, "Impossible."
"Stupid dog," Lu Yuxing finished his sentence.
"................"
Those two words had been used by Shang Jue countless times in his heart, but he never expected to hear them come out of Lu Yuxing's mouth one day.
He opened his mouth, wanting to say something, but due to his shock, he couldn't think of a response for a long time.
When did this happen? Where did he hear it? He had no memory of it at all...
"..."
Shang Jue obediently closed his mouth, for the first time behaving so well in front of Lu Yuxing.
Damn, if I had known, I wouldn't have mentioned it...
How did I end up adding another thing I need to apologize for?
🌸 Exciting News About the Story! 🌸
Hello, amazing readers!
THE STORY IS FINISHED NOW!
All remaining chapters are available for free on Google Docs! We can’t upload them here due to blog rules, and we can’t update NovelUpdates because of webfile sharing restrictions. Be sure to follow this blog for updates!You can read chapters 53 to 63 (end) here:
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A quiet and weak-looking person has nothing but beauty. Everyone thinks he won’t last long in the game. But they later find out that he hides a madman inside him. When his sanity value drops, the madness comes out. While others face collapse, for him, it's just the beginning.
In the real world, he is trapped and forced to be normal. But in this strange game, he can be himself again.
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Extra Chapter 1
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