The weather by the sea was unpredictable. The sky, which had just been filled with stars and the moon, suddenly showed signs of an impending storm.
The plan for the seven of them to camp by the beach to watch the sunrise was forced to be canceled. They hurried back to the villa before the heavy rain arrived.
Lin Tiao was filled with thoughts and didn’t bother to say much to the boys after getting home. She pulled Meng Xin and rushed back into the room.
She felt like a walking bomb, ready to explode at any moment, and she needed to pour out everything inside her.
All of it, not a single bit left.
In the room, only a floor lamp was on. The sky outside was dark, with fierce winds howling and thunder rumbling, as a storm approached.
Lin Tiao pulled Meng Xin to sit on the sofa, her expression serious. “I need to ask you something.”
Affected by her overly serious demeanor, Meng Xin also sat up straight, looking very serious. “I’ve loved before, and I don’t regret it.”
"...?"
Lin Tiao's initial urge to share her feelings was instantly shattered by Meng Xin's words.
She felt like a fool, wondering why she wanted to discuss relationship problems with someone like her—another lifelong single.
Seeing Lin Tiao remain silent, Meng Xin chuckled, “Alright, I won’t joke around anymore. What did you want to ask me?”
“I forgot.” Lin Tiao stood up from the sofa. “You distracted me, and now I can't remember.”
Meng Xin had experienced similar moments and didn't doubt the truth behind Lin Tiao's words. “Okay then, just tell me when you remember.”
“Sure.”
Without the one person she could confide in, Lin Tiao felt lost and lay on her bed.
She actually liked Jiang Yan.
This was truly unbelievable.
To be honest, she hadn't known Jiang Yan for that long. If they hadn't coincidentally become desk mates, she might have gone through high school and even longer without ever knowing there was someone like Jiang Yan in her life.
At first, Jiang Yan left an impression on Lin Tiao as an arrogant narcissist, acting foolishly and not fitting the image of a school bully at all.
Especially after becoming desk mates, Lin Tiao felt even more that he wasn’t a bully and wasn’t as arrogant and difficult as others said.
He would talk respectfully to teachers, never flipped tables or threw tantrums, and always submitted his assignments on time, achieving a nearly perfect score.
He enjoyed cheesy dramas and played games involving young girls competing with each other.
He didn’t get into fights or cause trouble, and he never bullied the weak.
Aside from that one time in gym class at the beginning of the school year, Lin Tiao had never seen him engage in any activities related to being a school bully.
But now…
Lin Tiao turned over in bed and saw the torrential rain outside.
Now, Jiang Yan was different in her eyes. Although he still acted arrogantly and foolishly, Lin Tiao realized he had many hidden sides to him.
He had many little secrets, could be vulnerable, needed comforting, could be protective, cared for others, and actually had a pretty good temper. He smiled a lot.
When he smiled, a small dimple appeared on his right cheek, like a mole at the corner of his eye—something you wouldn’t notice unless you looked closely.
He was also very intelligent. Lin Tiao had found many certificates related to physics competitions at his place, and there was always a physics exam paper spread out on his desk.
Each time, it was different.
He preferred multiple-choice questions when taking exams because they didn’t require much writing. When teachers discussed advanced questions in class, he would pay some attention, but after knowing the answers, he’d go back to his own tasks.
The more Lin Tiao thought, the fuller her heart felt, her mind filled with images related to Jiang Yan—sometimes in the classroom, sometimes at his place, and sometimes jumping back to scenes from the bar that night.
It was faster than watching a movie.
Unable to bear it anymore, she threw off the covers, sat up, took a long, deep breath, and said loudly, “Meng Xin, I remembered!”
Meng Xin, who was playing a game, glanced over at her. “What did you remember?”
“I remembered what I was going to tell you earlier.” Lin Tiao threw off the blanket, got up, and walked over to her, her pale toes touching the floor. “Meng Xin.”
“Yeah?” Meng Xin was in the middle of a critical moment in a ranked match, rapidly hitting the keyboard with her fingers as she and her teammates fought a dragon.
“I like my desk mate.”
“…”
As the jungler, Meng Xin froze for a moment. Her character in the game stood still in the dragon pit as the enemy team stole the dragon.
Her teammates, all random players, began spamming insults, and one even unmuted to yell, “Stupid jungler, if you can’t play, don’t try to steal the jungle, you piece of trash!”
Snapping back to reality, Meng Xin quickly typed a few words, then quit the game, tossing her phone aside as she looked up at Lin Tiao. “Which desk mate?”
“Which one?”
“Your middle school, elementary school, or kindergarten desk mate?”
Lin Tiao licked her lips, feeling a bit embarrassed. “High school.”
"..."
Three seconds of silence.
Meng Xin spoke earnestly, “I think it’s completely normal. Your desk mate is so handsome, and his personality isn’t bad. It’s natural to have feelings for him.”
Lin Tiao felt relieved that she finally said something sensible.
However, her next line brought it all back down to earth. “But don’t you think that at our age, our most important task should be to study hard? What’s with talking about relationships? It’s a waste of time.”
Lin Tiao replied, “Right now, I feel like sitting here discussing this with you is the real waste of time.”
Seeing Lin Tiao’s serious expression, Meng Xin couldn’t help but laugh. “Alright, I’m just kidding. Now tell me, what do you like about him?”
That question genuinely stumped Lin Tiao. She looked down, her fingers nervously playing with the sofa cushion, her face filled with confusion.
Noticing her state, Meng Xin drew from her life experience. “Let me rephrase the question. Now that you realize you like him, what’s your plan moving forward?”
“What do you mean, plan?”
When it came to relationships, Lin Tiao was completely clueless. She had never liked anyone before and didn’t know what one was supposed to do when they had feelings for someone.
“Just that you like him. Don’t you plan to be with him?”
Lin Tiao hesitated and said, “But I don’t even know if he likes me.”
“So what we have here is you having a one-sided crush on your desk mate.”
“It’s not entirely one-sided.”
Lin Tiao thought of recent events, a small idea bubbling up within her. She scratched her head and whispered, “I think he might like me a little too.”
Meng Xin let out a light sound of surprise, stroking her chin thoughtfully. She looked serious, like someone with a wealth of romantic experience. “Then our main task now is to figure out whether your desk mate actually likes you or not.”
Lin Tiao looked at her eagerly, very much wanting to learn. “How do we figure that out?”
After a moment of silence, Meng Xin earnestly suggested, “How about you just ask him directly?”
Lin Tiao felt it was a miracle that she hadn’t drifted away from Meng Xin since they met. “Forget it, let me think it over some more.”
Before she could finish her sentence, a sudden thunderclap echoed outside, followed by a bolt of lightning illuminating the sky and the surrounding area.
Before the thunder had faded, the lights in the villa suddenly went out, plunging the room into darkness.
“What’s going on?”
As Jiang Yan approached to knock on the door, Lin Tiao and Meng Xin were just getting ready to step outside to check the situation. When the door was pulled open, they saw a dark silhouette standing outside.
Lin Tiao’s heart skipped a beat. Instinctively, she gasped and took a step back. The person in front of her quietly spoke.
“It’s me.” The boy's voice was low and soothing, carrying a surprising comfort. “It’s just a power outage; don’t be afraid.”
“Don’t be afraid.”
Hearing those words, Lin Tiao felt her heart, which had just calmed, surge again, her face uncontrollably heating up.
Ever since she realized her indescribable feelings for Jiang Yan tonight, she couldn’t help but feel guilty whenever she saw him, as if she had done something terribly wrong behind his back.
Fortunately, in this moment of darkness, he couldn’t see the expression on her face.
“I’m not scared. You just startled me when you suddenly appeared.” As she spoke, Lin Tiao was trying to calm herself down and casually changed the subject. “Did the power go out?”
Jiang Yan glanced out at the flashing lightning. “Looks like it.”
The others also stepped out of their rooms, the sudden blackout having robbed everyone of their sleep. Guan Che suggested, “Let’s go to the living room downstairs and play some games.”
A few of them walked downstairs one after another. Meng Xin, being very perceptive, left Lin Tiao behind and hurried after the others, urging them to move faster.
“Hey.”
Only the two of them remained in the corridor.
Lin Tiao silently reassured herself: it’s fine; after all, he doesn’t know you like him. Just act normally, and no one will find out.
The mental reassurance proved effective; she felt more at ease. Taking a step forward, she closed the door. “Let’s go; we should join them downstairs.”
Jiang Yan nodded in agreement.
In the pitch-black hallway, Lin Tiao and Jiang Yan walked side by side. Perhaps it was the darkness that caused them to inadvertently draw closer together.
As their sleeves brushed against each other, Lin Tiao caught a faint scent of him—he must have showered again, as the lingering smell of smoke was completely gone.
Thinking of showering reminded Lin Tiao of that indescribable scene in his room.
That unforgettable image flooded her mind once more, causing her face to heat up uncontrollably.
She dared not think any further. Instinctively, she quickened her pace but, due to the lack of light, failed to see a flowerpot sitting aside and accidentally kicked it.
Her foot stumbled, and she leaned forward, but Jiang Yan quickly caught her from behind, preventing her from falling.
Just as she steadied herself, Jiang Yan admonished her in a low voice, “Are you stupid? It’s pitch black; why are you rushing around?”
His youthful presence was so close that Lin Tiao felt a bit breathless. Wanting to create some distance, she randomly blurted out, “I feel a bit hot.”
Jiang Yan looked down at her and suddenly recalled the unfinished song from the bar earlier that night, one that had received no response.
He slightly turned his face, his throat rolling as he called her name, “Lin Tiao.”
“Mm?” She looked up, trying to see him better.
In the darkness, the clarity of his voice stood out.
“Was that song good?”
Lin Tiao’s breath hitched, her lips parted slightly, but she couldn’t bring herself to answer.
Was it good?
The answer was undoubtedly yes.
If it hadn’t been good, she wouldn’t have realized her feelings for him. She might still be debating whether to see a neurologist or a cardiologist upon returning home.
But for some reason, she couldn’t express the compliments that had once come so easily when she was with Hu Hanghang. Now, she couldn’t say a single word in front of him.
Outside, the wind intertwined with the sound of thunder, creating quite a racket.
Lin Tiao bit her lip, her mind in turmoil, and after a long pause, she finally managed to murmur, “It was okay.”
In the darkness, they couldn’t see each other’s expressions, but every little sound seemed magnified. It seemed Jiang Yan smiled slightly, but his voice was soft and quickly disappeared.
At that moment, a bolt of lightning struck outside, casting a bright light that illuminated the area. In an instant, Lin Tiao caught a glimpse of his expression.
He had a slight smile, which made things feel even more ambiguous. Lin Tiao felt herself getting hotter, wanting to escape this situation quickly. She raised her hand and waved it near her face, feeling a bit flustered. “Let’s go; it’s really hot upstairs.”
Before they had walked very far, she was suddenly pulled back by someone behind her. A youthful presence pressed close, his somewhat cool fingers left her arm but didn’t withdraw; they trailed down and hooked onto her finger.
Lin Tiao stiffened, feeling all her blood rush to that one point.
“If you can’t see, then let me hold onto you,” Jiang Yan said, using just one finger to hook onto her pinky.
Despite the minimal contact, Lin Tiao felt completely at his mercy, her mind blank.
With the rumbling thunder echoing, she regained her senses and tried to pull her hand back, but he tightened his grip even more.
Using another knuckle, he held her finger firmly, leaving her with no chance of escaping.
With no way out, she could only follow along.
Lin Tiao had no idea how she managed to navigate the dozen or so stairs. All her attention was fixated on their linked hands.
She looked at the outline of Jiang Yan in the darkness, feeling an urge to ask Meng Xin whether he really liked her.
But she didn’t dare.
Her emotional world was a blank slate—clean and void of anything—until one day, someone pushed open the door and walked in.
He used his every action and word to color her previously blank emotional landscape. But colors eventually fade and disappear.
Lin Tiao didn’t want to gamble on that outcome.
At their age, feelings were quite straightforward; liking someone simply meant liking them, and disliking meant just that—no convoluted complexities involved.
She was direct about her feelings but also quite slow on the uptake. Once she understood her feelings, she became cautious.
She thought maybe she could find another way to get the answers she wanted.
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